Well, I went to Evanston and met with a dean at Alma Mater. Looks like I should be able to take some night classes in the fall and sneak out the back door with a diploma. Now I have to think about what I'll do with the degree. Look into law school? Think about some variation on philosophy/history/sociology of science? Sink into a real job and pay off my credit cards? Yeah. Options. I do not like options.
See also: oblongish.