And what did you do for Valentine’s Day? Would you believe I saw this thing?
Realizing that something was needed that would posses superior strength,the engineers began the task of constructing the power monster. The metal marvel began to take shape and after long hours and hard work, Megasaurus was born! This mechanical beast stood over 3 stories tall and weighed 50,000 lbs. 1,000 feet of veins and arteries feed his mechanical heart, pumping at 50 gallons per minute. Blood pressure exceeding 2,500 pounds per square inch, giving him 5 tons of crushing force in each of his mammoth claws. He could lift 30,000 pounds to his gigantic mouth. His massive jaws attaining 15,000 pounds of biting force. To ensure total destruction, Megasaurus was equipped with 200,000 BTU’s of burning power.
The Torch says, by way of 411:
Triple H has made it known that he does not want to continue to work with Chris Benoit following WrestleMania XX. The Game is now pushing for Edge to return as a member of the RAW brand so that the two of them can have a program together.
How about that? Is Trips really that short of faces to feud with? That short of more talented and exciting careers to ruin? The answer, of course, is yes. I can’t believe anyone would even consider doing this. No wait, I can believe it. I can totally believe it.
Brett posts his top 25 most-listened-to records of 2003, and I am shocked, shocked, shocked, to find that I haven’t listened to any of them this year. I am heartened to see the Circle Jerks make the list for the second year in a row. God bless you, circle jerks, wherever you are.
Maura.com’s list for the Village Voice does better according to my criterion, since not only did Mark at Hard Boiled try to sell me the Dizzee Rascal record, I actually bought the Quintron record (but not from Mark. Sorry, Mark!). On the downside, I think I saw Adult in a bar and hated them.
And people, where is the year-end love for the Dirt McGirt track on the Neptunes record this year? You know what I’m talking about. Pop Sh*t. That’s what’s up. Straight crash dummies, that’s what you are.
No safety deposit box could be called self respecting if it does not contain
at least three of the following five items:
- 9mm handgun (extra clips of ammo are optional).
- bound stacks of uncirculated currency, foreign and domestic
(non-sequential serial numbers a must).
- five to ten polaroids or other black-and-white photographs with criminal,
sexual, or other deviant content.
- forged papers (passport, drivers license, SSID card), in envelopes or
folders labeled by false identity.
- key to rented locker in bus/train terminal or garage/warehouse on
outskirts of city.
In Chicago, I recommend the North Side Federal Savings and Loan
Association.
Todd Martin has responded to my query and writes:
On Raw the night before the election, Lawler and Ross were instructed to go out there and bash Gore and support Bush. So they compared Gore and Lieberman to the Right to Censor, and Lawler at one point said he was going to vote for Bush. That was what I was referring to.

Well, that does sound like something Vince McMahon would do, doesn’t it? Could be a violation of election law, too.
Or is it something Linda McMahon would do? If one consults opensecrets.org, a database of large politcal contributions, an enterprising sort would find that Linda has given at least $9,500 to various political campaigns and organizations, including $6,000 to the Connecticut Republican Campaign Committee.
Another name on the list is Kevin Murray, who I think is a California state senator (D). He used to be a talent agent for William Morris Agency — perhaps he used to represent a wrestler? Stephanie Sanchez Hunter (D) challenged Christopher Shays twice for the U.S. House of Representatives seat in Connecticut’s 4th congressional district. John A. Stephen (R) ran for Congress in New Hampshire’s 1st district in 2002.
I guess we could call Linda an independent, if she weren’t giving the bulk of her contributions to the Republican party. I wonder whether Vince is contributing through her, or making no political contributions at all?